Read my Latest Watercolour Blog Titled “It's More Than Thinking Positive”
Ever notice how some things can completely absorb your thoughts? And yet at other times you just spend time trying to push it all away? This is me and my art. Though the pushing away is becoming less and less often, and I’m finally coming to accept that this is where my gifts are and it’s who I am meant to be. There’s no longer any doubt it’s the road I’m meant to be on.
It takes a long time to get to who you really are. Especially when so many voices, in particular during growing up years, are telling you to be something else. Their reason and logic, and anger, say you’ve got to have a “real” job, you’ll never make it otherwise. It takes so darn long to quiet those voices and listen to the deeper voice that was there all along telling me who I really am.
“Waves” 36x36” The latest abstract.
Well, better late than never. I mean, assuming I still have decades, there’s still lots of time to be the artist I was born to be. And yes, it was determined that long ago.
I’m still working a full-time job, and spending pretty much every other free moment I have on building into the art work. I’ve just finished revamping my website (big thanks to my talented daughter!), and am part way through an art marketing course that is teaching me a lot. Nuts and bolts stuff that I really needed a hand learning. I couldn’t really afford it, but decided after loads of researching courses that I couldn’t really afford not to. And even then, there were still the odd voices telling me I’ve made a mistake. What do people think? That I’m just supposed to barely get by forever until the government pension kicks in and I live on next to nothing for the rest of my life?
What about that trip to Italy I’ve dreamt of for decades and have yet to take? And the other trip to England? And the dreams of maybe relocating to Europe completely! As well as the Jeep Wrangler I’ve always wanted? Yes, that’s been my dream car for as long as I can remember…. Even though my son says when it comes to cars, I could stand to dream bigger. And then there’s those Manolo Blahniks I’ve wanted to wear ever since Carrie started buying them on Sex & The City. And I don’t plan on just wearing them anywhere. Those will be strutted down a street in New York, or London, or Paris, or Rome... Maybe all of them. And as someone on social media recently reminded me, it wouldn’t hurt to have a little faith for the right partner to come along too. He can walk all those streets with me. Wouldn’t that be great!
And as Hashem and I have talked, at length these days with all the downtime in the last year and a half, He tells me my dreams are not crazy. They aren’t far-fetched. Rather they’ve been given to me by Him! And if there’s anyone who can be relied on it would be Adonai Himself. He is not leading me down the garden path. It’s me that’s led me astray more than anything. Listening to fear instead of faith gets me nowhere. I am going with G-d and there just isn’t any other choice that’s reasonable.
Maybe this positive attitude, placed in the right Person, and person, is what has opened up all the new creativity in abstraction too. I love what is coming out of these paintings lately. I go back and forth between abstract and landscape paintings. The balance is wonderful. And the freedom is amazing. I am excited about what is coming out of my studio.
And I’m excited about the future, what’s in store for me, and I look forward now with a smile on my face. Things are only going to get better. Much, much better.
“Coastal Quiet” 10x32” The latest landscape.
